This is a hot topic among Christians and the last thing I want to do is spark some crazy debate… That’s not what this is. Chris and I decided a long time ago that we weren’t going to “do Santa” with our kids. We have several reasons, including but not limited to the following:
1. Christmas is about Jesus. Period. No pleasantly plump man with rosy cheeks and a white beard ever hung on a cross for my sins. Super spiritual? Maybe. I don’t care. America has made Christmas about Santa and the presents he brings. Instead of Christmas parties where we sing Happy Birthday Jesus or celebrate His coming to earth so we could spend eternity with him, we bring a guy in a Santa suit with presents. To us, it takes away from the real reason for Christmas and we just like to keep the focus on Jesus. It’s the same with Easter and the bunny and eggs. But for now, we talk about Santa.
2. It’s a lie. I just can’t lie to my kids. I know it’s innocent, and fun, and all of that… But I just can’t do it. I can’t tell them that Santa is coming, or that presents are from Santa, or that there’s some northern most place with elves when there’s not. I remember being so angry angry at my parents and resenting them for lying to me for so many years about Santa. They-like everyone else- had the BEST intentions and I love them for that. But that’s just not what we feel is best for our family.
Now, before you “bah hum bug” me… I will say this. I love The Polar Express. I love the imagination of children and having childlike faith in such crazy ideas. I love the happiness that a man dressed up like Santa brings to the eyes of so many children. I love the magic feeling of it all. The whole idea of St. Nick has Christian origins, unlike many other Christmas traditions. This isn’t a Halloween-type thing where I feel like I am celebrating something pagan and evil by participating. This is a just a moral, prayerfully considered thing that we have decided is best for our kids.
That being said, I’d love all of your viewpoints. Please don’t be ugly- this is something I know people feel very strongly about, and we DEFINITELY do not think less of ANYONE who does the “Santa” thing. However, I especially want to hear from those of you who don’t participate in this part of tradition. The fact of the matter is, Santa is EVERYWHERE at Christmas. Other kids at school/daycare are told he is real. We plan to adopt older kids who might have been told he IS real. How do we explain that he is imaginary, that he is fun to think about, but then have him show up at the mall or at a party? What happens when other kids get presents from Santa and ours don’t? How do we let them experience in the magic of things like The Polar Express but tell them that’s not really what Christmas is- Christmas is about Jesus.
Please don’t try to convince us our stance is wrong… This is something we have fought with and prayed about for 2+ years. We are very open to other ideas and viewpoints, but for now, this is truly what we feel is best for us. Maybe God will change our hearts, but this is how it is for now… But we do wanna hear from you! Share your hearts, your stories, your traditions. Tell us what you tell your kids, how you react when they talk to friends and have different home Santa issues… We want your input!!
We don’t “do Santa” either. Pretty much for the exact same reasons you stated. We do however celebrate St. Nicholas day (I can get behind a holiday honoring a man who tried to help those less fortunate without anyone knowing what he was doing.)
Anyway, our daughter is almost 4. I figure by next year she will start asking the “who is Santa” questions. We’ve decided to tell her that Santa is a tradition lots of people have. He’s pretend but it’s fun to pretend so it’s okay if her friends pretend that. And she should be nice and let them pretend at Christmas time.
I figure as long as we emphasize the pretend part we aren’t lying to her and she will have LOTS of friends who believe in Santa and while we don’t “do Santa” I really don’t want my kid being the one who ruins it for her entire kindergarten class.
we’ve never played Santa. We’ve taught our kids that it’s a game the world plays, and we’ve decided not to play the game because we want to focus on Jesus, instead. Our girls have never had a hard time with friends who believe in Santa and “play the game.” They know not to spoil their game…and I don’t think they’ve ever been upset that they don’t get to play. When they realize that someone believes in Santa, they just go with it or change the subject
We’ve also emphasized that just b/c someone plays the Santa game does not mean that they are not Christians.
We’ve always read the story of St. Nicholas to them, and explained where the game started. We also taught them that sometimes we can be a St. Nick to another family at Christmas time, secretly bringing gifts to people who may not get any gifts otherwise. That’s always fun (b/c it’s so much fun to give) and a learning experience (b/c they have to learn that they can give to others without receiving a thank you).
We’ve always started Christmas morning off with a birthday breakfast for Jesus…remembering Him first, then receiving presents. The girls get 3 gifts, just like Jesus did. And throughout the holiday, we give Jesus gifts by meeting the needs of others less fortunate than us, giving gifts to family, friends & neighbors, etc.
here are a couple of really great books that we’ve read year after year:
Santa Are you for Real? by Harold Myra
and
Mommy, Was Santa Claus Born on Christmas too? by Barbar Knoll (her whole “Mommy, Why?” series is good)
Merry Christmas to you! Hope it’s filled with HIS presence
We also don’t “do santa”! Our daughter is almost 4 and hasn’t really asked a lot of questions yet. We do have the book “Santa are you for real” but she’s not into it yet. We just tell her that Santa is a fun story just like The Little Mermaid (which she loves right now). We talk about the historical St Nick and how he did give presents etc, but that he was a man and he doesn’t live forever and that he’s in heaven with Jesus now. I purposefully don’t say that santa’s “not real” b/c I don’t want her repeating that! I say things like “santa WAS real”. Anyway, good question, I look forward to seeing what others say!
Even though I’m not a Christian and am very secular, I don’t plan on ever lying to my future kids (at least not on purpose), so I won’t be telling them that Santa is real. I’ll tell them he’s a myth, and there’s lots of myths out there.
Plus I think it’s better for kids to see Christmas as a time of people giving to other people. I want them to know the presents came from people who had to spend money or work hard to make them. I want their focus to be on showering love on others and not on pleasing a mythological man in the north.
Guess I’m the first to say that we do the Santa thing. I grew up doing the Santa thing with my family and my parents still write “From Santa” on my husband’s and I’s gifts. What we attempt to do each year is pull all the magic of the season together. Santa always leaves 3 gifts for the kids because they shouldn’t recieve more than the King did. He also leaves a letter letting them know how proud he is of how they kept Jesus in their heart all year long and how much they gave to others. As we open gifts, we talk about Jesus and His birth and what it means for us today. I know soon we’ll be facing the “questions” about Santa and I have no problem with letting Santa go…until then we’ll cherish every excited moment while still remembering why we celebrate this glorious day.
You are a brave lady! Thanks for bringing up the touchy subject:) We are going on 13 years of “No Santa” in our home. We had the same convictions as you mentioned and wanted to glorify God in the Holiday, rather than glorify Walmart or Santa. This has been a hard road with family members that do celebrate Santa style, but one that we hold on to. Rather than trying to convince our children that there is no Santa, we simply celebrate Christ at this time of year. We do still give gifts, and have a Christmas tree, but focus on the birth of Christ. One year we celebrated Franklin Graham style and gave our children a shoebox full of gifts. We attend a church service in celebration, and focus on the birth of Christ. This becomes another worldly issue for me, as we grew up believing in Santa and the whole magical holiday. I sometimes feel like I am denying my children that special time of childhood, but in reality I have given them truth instead, and the truth of a Savior more importantly. As in other things, we simply explained to our children what the holiday is about, how the world celebrates, and have shown them the wisdom in celebrating it to glorify God. After all, it is really all about Him!
You know Meg, I think it’s very funny that you’ve posted something on this topic. This year, I had already started entertaining the idea of Santa Claus with Abby and Deke was too… but then my mom and I were talking about it, and she said something like, why are you doing that with her? (as you can tell by that remark, we definately weren’t taught about Santa when we were growing up) And I told her that I didn’t really see much harm in it, besides a little let down when she found out it wasn’t true, and that I also thought that sparking imagination in children was very important to their development! She agreed with me on the imagination thing, but not on the rest.
So I asked Mom, why infact did they never really “do Santa,” and she replied, #1 – “Dad and I just didn’t feel right that it would be right to lie to you children… ya’ll might have been really upset with us and that could hinder our relationship with you kids.” #2 – “When I was growing up and believning in Santa Claus, I remember this HUGE disappointment and anger when I found out… I was angry with my parents and truly hurt. I just didn’t want you kids to feel this pain or let down like I did.” And point #3 – the answer that changed my mind the most – “Who’s to say that when Abby {my daughter} finds out that Santa wasn’t really real, and that you and Deke were lying this whole time, that she won’t automatically say, Ok then, if Santa’s not real, then Jesus is not real. I mean they can both do great things and I’ve never even seen them.”
I told Mom, that I wouldn’t have thought that growing up, but she also said that you never know what your children are thinking… some kids are different. Abby is a little thinker, that’s for sure… so I don’t want her to ever doubt that our father is REAL and He is ALIVE! Needless to say, we’re still going to go thru with the Santa thing this year (allowing her to believe for now but not pushing it down her throat) since we’ve already chalked him up to be so cool and real and since she’s so excited about Santa this year… and then next year, we’re going to moreless shift focus… zoning in more on the REAL reason for the season, which is celebrating Jesus’ birth. We’ve been sure to tell her and teach her about Jesus’ birth this year as well, but next year it’s ONLY HIM!
Sorry for the book…
Much love,
Amanda