From the DISGUSTING process fast food goes through before it hits their mouths (see above picture of “chicken nuggets”)… The fact that school cafeteria meats are made from that same gag-worthy process (I mean they’re soaking the meat in ammonia, people! AMMONIA!!!!!)… That moms aren’t informed of the ingredients in the vaccines they’re injecting into their tiny babies fragile system (I do NOT think vaccines are bad, by the way. So don’t fuss at me about that )… To the artificial colors and dyes in SO many things they eat or ingest… To the packaged and processed food that are marketed as “healthy” but one serving contains TWICE the amount of sodium as McDonald’s french fries (yes, you read that right)… To the chemicals in the formula we feed them and the diapers we cover them in 24 hours a day, 7 days a week for years… To the toys they chew on that contain toxic chemicals, lead and dyes… To the lotions, soaps and creams we lather on our little ones with more parabens and chemicals than you could ever imagine. Did you know that human skins absorbs 80% of everything we put on it?

Even beautiful things (that I encourage) like baby wearing are tainted by carriers with massive design flaws that can cause hip distortion, and encourage baby facing out which research shows can cause spinal problems and anxiety for baby. (Baby Bjorn, I am talking to you!)

I could go on and on, but I will spare you. My main point here is that it is our responsibility as parents to monitor every.single.thing that we put on or in our little ones. Yes, it seems overwhelming. Yes, it “seems” expensive (but I can tell you from someone who has never had much money that it is TOTALLY doable and worth it). Yes, people might think you’re weird.

I have found that replacing one thing at a time when you run out of it is the easiest and most cost-conscious way to remedy the household things. Replace your chemical laden cleaners with a greener option. All the discount stores sell better options now for the same price as the bad stuff. Buy wooden toys or check labels. Amazon has some AWESOME “green” toy brands at good prices, and Melissa and Doug can be found lots of places now. Pack a school lunch for your kiddos. Yes, this is more work. Consider it an investment and a very small labor of love. Replace processed and packaged foods with fresh foods. Buy organic when you can, but remember organic does NOT always equal healthy- just clean.

I truly believe 110% that cancer and disease rates have sky rocketed over the past few decades due to the junk we have started ingesting and surrounding ourselves with. Cultures that lead a cleaner, more junk-free lifestyle are proven to have lesser rates of these diseases. We are America! We lead the way in so many things, and it frustrates me so much to see us drop the ball so often in this regard. Let’s take better care of our children, our future.

Do I think I am a better mom because I care about this stuff and you don’t? DEFINITELY not! Do I judge you if you feed your kids processed food, buy traditional soap brands or clean with bleach? ABSOLUTELY not! I am definitely NOT the expert, but just a passionate mama who wants the best for her kiddos, like many of you reading this. That looks a little different for me than it does for others, and that’s ok. The goal is always the same- being the best for our babies. Some of the girls whom I respect the most as mothers and as women could care less about any of this. I don’t want this to be polarizing or sound judgey- I just hope to share my passion about this in a helpful, educational, loving way.

Hopping off the soap box now, but feel free to email me at meghanmatt@gmail.com for website and book recommendations on this subject.

I follow them on Instagram and Twitter and they posted something today that completely smoked me. If this isn’t worth a Tweet repeat, I don’t know what is:

Grace is having a relationship with someone’s heart, not their behaviors.

I know I need grace a LOT. And I also know I need to show it more quickly when people I love do things I don’t love.

Grace. Jesus lived this everyday and I pray that one day I will, too.

Will you?

I fasted social media. Specifically- Facebook, Twitter and Instagram. You would think seven days without it would be easy, but it showed me how much I depend on it. And going without it taught me a lot.

1. There are other ways in life to spend my time. It forced me to do more of the things I should be doing- housework, reading to my kids, talking to my husband, spending time with God. Seems obvious, right?

2. I don’t want to be one of those whiny people that complains their life through tweets.

3. I don’t need to narrate my day. No one cares.

4. I don’t need to comment/judge everything.

Don’t get me wrong… I think social media is an awesome and incredible tool. Facebook and twitter have been powerful forces of prayer, ideas, well wishes, and heart connections in my life. And I’m still me- I am outspoken and sometimes people think I say too much.

And that’s fine with me.

I appreciate these outlets for what they are-great ways to connect with old friends and new, get ideas, share interests, and show off pictures of those you love.

I just don’t need to be so… Annoying? Ever-present? I don’t know. I just wanna be more like Jesus.

Presley had a little afternoon indoor picnic with her teddy bear and baby doll. They enjoyed fruits and veggies, water, and Bible stories (which she read with much animation). It pretty much made my heart melt.

Oh, and check out those pointed toes. Love!

And between his smile and that wrist fat roll— oh.my.goodness. I can’t contain the cute.

Sweet Moses isn’t feeling great so he hasn’t been much in the mood for pictures. He starts a new routine at school tomorrow so send some prayers his way that it would go well.

…Peace, love, and afternoon smiles…

I don’t LOVE steaming/baking/boiling food on four burners, pureeing/blending them, washing processor/blender over and over, pouring into ice cube trays, popping out of ice cube trays, refilling ice cube trays, etc etc…

However, I do LOVE that my baby is getting homemade food- made with love and hand picked, healthy, nutritious ingredients with no additives or preservatives. I love that I can taste it and not be grossed out.

Yes, I do love that. Very much

I also love that this entire batch cost $50 and will last for 3 months.

And after a few hours this weekend, Elikai now has eggplant, lima beans, green beans, Brussels sprouts, broccoli, cauliflower, peaches, apples, pears, carrots, sweet potatoes, peas, chick peas, split peas, honeydew, cantelope, zucchini, spinach, butternut squash, bananas and avocados to choose from individually or mixed together, and enjoy for quite a while.

Because goodness gracious, that boy is SO worth it!

Really hard.

But then there are these moments that you get a clear picture of what God saw when He orchestrated it all. And you remember why He’s in charge.

He is good.

He is so so so good.

(And for the record, lately adoption has been the beautiful picture it is printed to be. And we are loving every moment. )

I whipped up some pureed sweet potatoes, sat him in a little chair, and my plans went out the window. I couldn’t get the food in his mouth fast enough as he opened up big (BIG) and wide and practically jumped out of his chair trying to get to the spoon.

It was bliss.

Ladies and gentlemen, we have an eater.

Dear Meghan,

First of all, let me assure you that these days- these horrible, awful, miserable days- they will end. You will make it out, and you will be stronger. You will put your guard up for many years and people will take it as you being mean or a snob. But you’re not a snob, you’re broken.

You are NOT who they say you are. You are not a loser. You are not fat. You definitely don’t resemble a marsupial just because you have that endearing little pooch at the bottom of your belly. Your forehead is perfect and is just the way God intended for it to be. I’m happy to report that after high school, no one will even ever mention it again, or call you “forehead” or “fivehead” because of its size. You are not someone who copies or imitates others, despite what you’re accused of. In fact, you are someone who often blazes the way when people don’t understand or agree with you.

The people who spit on you- figuratively and literally- they don’t matter. They hold no value in your life- then or now. They are just immature and will eventually realize how silly it was. The people who tortured you so much that you had to leave the school you were at- forgive them. Pray for them. Move past it, because it’s not worth it. The years of bullying and harassment that you have already experienced, I am sorry to say they aren’t over. But I am happy to say that God will be there for you through it all. You will get through high school with a few true friends who fought with you and were there for you.

Eventually you will find your identity in Christ, and that will be amazing. You will endure some hard years first… Some awful things will happen. But you will get there. I promise. No matter how bad you screw up, God’s grace is always there for you. You are never too far from Him.

And good news! You and your mom will become so close. Crazy close. (Weird to think of now, huh? As you blast that terrible music with cursing from your room and scream at her that you hate her? Yes, you will grow to treasure her more than words can say.) You will find a church home that accepts you and loves you and is committed to you. You will get married to the most amazing (and hottest) man on the planet and have beautiful, incredible babies. You will not be the career woman you always thought you would be. But you will be exactly who God meant for you to be, and you will find such immense peace and joy in that.

You are misunderstood. And you will continue to be so throughout your adult life… But stay true to yourself, be kind, love others, live graciously, and eventually I have faith that this will change. Remember that your tongue holds the power of life and death, and just like things people say to you have hurt you deeply- you also hurt others with your words.

You are not perfect, but you will eventually serve the One who is, and He will love you despite it all.

You are beautiful. You are special. You are smart and talented and created in God’s image. Take care of yourself. Don’t be reckless, but instead be cautious. Remember how much Jesus loves you, and try to reflect that in your life, spirit and attitude.

Do NOT let yourself be defined by those who tear you down. You are not who they say you are. You are a fighter, and you will fight for yourself and those you love. People won’t always understand it, but you will be strong in it.

It does get better. It gets so.much.better. Just hold on- hold on to those great friends you’ve made, hold on to who you know you are, and most of all- hold on to Jesus.

He will get you through it. I promise.

Just hold on. It gets better.

Love…The older, wiser (but still has tons to learn about myself) version of you.

And I just deleted it.

Why? Because as I sat in a dark room rocking my beautiful baby boy, I saw a picture of Michelle Duggar’s tiny, stillborn baby’s hand against the tip of her finger. I remembered that my friend Rachel lost her husband. I thought of a sweet lady whom I love whose husband is fighting a losing war with cancer and she is left at home to deal with issues as they arise.

I came out into the living room to my 3 year old princess who just wanted me to cuddle her. I have a precious son in the next room who has taught me so much. I have a husband working doing everything he physically can to provide for us, and he absolutely loves me and treasures me. I have parents and a brother who adore me in spite of my short comings.

It’s been a hard year, but so many people have it so much harder. I am blessed beyond measure, beyond any realm of my understanding. I am so  grateful to God for His grace, His love, and His neverending faithfulness.

I am confident this new year will bring us to new levels of His love despite our imperfections or our circumstances.

My God is faithful.

He loves me.

He is good and His love endures.

And I love Him.

And these amazing people He set me in a family with.

So.

Crazy.

Thankful.